Perimenopause & My Skin’s Identity Crisis: A Love Letter to Oils

One day, I’m a glowing goddess. The next, my face thinks it’s 14 again.

Welcome to perimenopause—the era of hormonal whiplash, where your skin wakes up each day playing a game of “Guess Who?” Will it be parched and peeling? Or maybe a charming breakout that says “remember high school?” If you’re lucky, it’s both. As if the internal changes weren’t enough, now our skin has joined the rebellion.

Some mornings, I catch a glimpse in the mirror and think, “Okay, not bad. We’re defying gravity today.” Other mornings? I’m startled—and not in the poetic, mysterious way. More like a jump scare. Let’s just say my reflection and I are in a complicated relationship.

I’ve always admired that flawless, pore-less look we’re conditioned to chase, but between a little too much sun, naturally reactive skin, and a lifelong dislike for foundation, it was never in the cards. I don’t want to smother my face under layers of product just to mimic perfection. I have skin, not a filter—and frankly, I’d like to keep it breathing.

So skincare has always been my focus: calm the redness, hydrate without triggering breakouts, and aim to soften the fine lines without glowing like a disco ball by noon. Sounds simple enough, right? You’d think. But after years of trying everything from pharmacy shelves to overpriced promises in glass jars… nothing worked. Not long-term. Not consistently.

So what gives?

Hormones: The Puppeteers of Your Skin’s Mood Swings

                           

Let’s break it down: your skin isn’t just being dramatic—it’s reacting to some serious behind-the-scenes changes. Starting in your late 30s and into your 40s, estrogen levels begin their slow decline, and that once-plentiful collagen? Yeah, it's peacing out at a rate of about 1% per year. Combine that with slower cell turnover, reduced elasticity, and an increase in skin sensitivity, and suddenly, your tried-and-true skincare routine isn’t cutting it anymore.

 

The Fun Side Effects of Perimenopause on Your Skin

(And by “fun,” I obviously mean completely unnecessary chaos)

Let’s talk about what’s really happening beneath the surface—because it’s not just your patience running thin:

✔ Loss of collagen & elasticity → Skin starts to look a little less “plump and bouncy” and a little more “why do my cheeks look like they’ve given up on life?”
✔ Increased dryness → Oil production tanks, leaving your face tight, flaky, and radiating all the vibrance of a saltine cracker.
✔ Random breakouts → Thought you left acne behind with your butterfly clips? Think again. Hormonal rollercoasters love a surprise guest appearance.
✔ Heightened sensitivity & redness → That trusted moisturizer you’ve sworn by for years? Suddenly feels like it’s plotting against you.
✔ Uneven skin texture → Enlarged pores, rough patches, and unexpected flare-ups become part of the new normal. (Bonus points if they all show up at once!)

Let’s be honest—none of this is ideal. But if there’s one thing women are built for, it’s transformation. We’ve made it through breakups, bad bangs, childbirth, and at least one regrettable eyebrow phase. We adapt. We figure it out. We find what works—and this time, it starts with giving your skin what it actually needs, not what the 25-year-old influencer on TikTok says it should.

Why I Was (Once) an Oil Skeptic

Rewind to my pre-oil days: my skin was reactive, constantly flushed, and the kind of porous that made anything “rich” feel like a risk. Oils, in my mind, were the enemy—why would I add more oil to skin that already seemed overwhelmed and confused?

If that mindset sounds familiar, you’re not alone. But here’s the truth: avoiding richer, nourishing products might be exactly what’s making your skin worse. I didn’t realize it at the time, but reaching for lighter, more astringent formulas in an effort to “calm things down” only pushed my skin further into a reactive spiral. The more I stripped it, the louder it screamed.

(If you missed my deep dive into common oil mistakes, check out this post  "Facial Oils 101” where I learned everything the hard way!)

How Oils Became My Skincare Soulmates

Turns out, plant oils aren’t the enemy—they’re the rescue team. The right blend can balance sebum, strengthen the skin barrier, and soothe inflammation without clogging pores. When my skin felt like it was in a constant state of rebellion, oils were the only thing that calmed the chaos. After consistently using a blend of these oils (hello, Haute Couture!) for months, I noticed: 

• ✔️Less redness and fewer flare-ups 
• ✔️Softer, more hydrated skin 
• ✔️A smoother texture with fewer dry patches 
• ✔️A natural glow—like my skin finally found its happy place

I still get the occasional hormonal breakout, but overall, my skin feels more balanced than it has in years and the spa like feel I get from these oils is what I look forward to the most, just applying it feels like silk on my skin.

The Love Letter: Oils, You Saved Me

Dear botanical oils,
I’m sorry I doubted you. I thought you’d clog my pores and make me look greasy, but instead, you nourished, balanced, and healed my skin. You gave me back my glow—not the sweaty kind, but the lit-from-within kind. You soothed my rosacea, softened my texture, and made me believe in skincare again. Consider this my official apology—and my lifelong commitment.

XOXO,
A Former Oil Skeptic Turned Devoted Fan

If your skin is playing the ultimate game of hormonal roulette, oils might just be your winning bet. Have you tried incorporating oils into your routine? Let’s talk skin transformations—drop a comment below! 

🌿 Stay radiant, stay real. See you next week!

Steph

The Luxe Edit